“In a survival situation, the most important things are water, courage, and a first-aid kit. I've got water and an endless supply of courage, but I don't have a first-aid kit. Sometimes I don't have a whole lot of motivation, either. I may be a daring explorer, but sometimes I just want to loaf around all day and sleep. Wait... What if the president reads this journal? Uh... Ahem... I'd never dream of slacking on the job! Yeah...”
Sales pitch
“A must-have medical item for explorers. If you need powerful results, this is for you! It even comes with a testimonial from our employees! Use this and fear nothing ever again.”